KIDS & THE THINGS THEY SAY!
I have three boys.
My oldest (MO) is my smallest. He has always been focused, serious, and has a steel-trap memory. A little wiry great athlete who loves the finer things in life: girls, clothes and any stuffed animal that is super soft. Funny how he also has a fiery temper and excels in the art of manipulation! Presently fancies himself as a Momma’s boy.
My middle (MM) son is like fine crystal. Everything about this boy has a pattern with edge. Beyond his years. Often my teacher. There is fragility, studliness, and a big dose of self-awareness. Very modest and shy at first, he prefers to study before reaching out. Great swimmer, and unfortunately for his brothers, a great boxer. He feels everything very deeply and has an affinity for animals. We are very alike. Presently fancies himself as his own man.
My youngest (MY) is big in every way. His head, his tall solid body, his blue eyes, his lips, his laugh. He loves to love and is always the first to compliment. Announces to all that his mom looks beautiful or that dinner is delicious. Loves to eat, and then there is his love for his big brothers. Idol worship even though he endures being the brunt of whatever they decide to do with him. One hour he is the great playmate because he’ll do anything to get their attention, the next he's a punching bag or the victim of their teasing. Never occurs to him that his size would allow him to pummel them. The most cheerful and full of optimism. A humor like an old-school comedian: Johnny Carson meets Jackie Gleason. He reminds me to be so thankful. Presently fancies himself as Dad’s guy.
From when they started speaking, there was so much laughter. The things they would say to us and each other! Their reasoning, choice of words, their frankness; I never wanted to forget. We keep a book in the kitchen. As they say funny things we write them down with the date in the book. Inevitably once a year that book is read aloud, both the old and new entries. So funny. I tease them that I’ll read it to future girlfriends. I probably will! These are some of them.
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September 16, 2009
Conversation #2
I had always planned to put all 3 of my boys in one bedroom. I really think it has bonded them. There is no set alliance between them, and lots of time spent in harmony. The fights are constant, but just about territory. Each of them started out alone. When they slept through the night and stayed in bed they got to be in the big boy room. There was always a period of adjustment. Back to getting out of bed. The pitter patter of footsteps back and forth across the ceiling leading to fits of laughter and inevitably tears. The really bad nights had us punctuating this chapter with trips to the room and stern lectures and ultimately threats followed by private remorse. Eventually the excitement of being roommates wore off, and we all would sleep well.
Looking back, MO and MM passed that bump pretty smoothly. It was MY’s arrival that triggered an avalanche of consequences. No desserts. No movies. No playdates. That kind of life went on for awhile.
I’m pretty sure nighttime parties still happen, they’ve just learned to outsmart the monitor. I don’t get suspicious with silence…. This incident happened at the very outset of the threesome, when I had forgotten the last time, and I was filled with optimism of an uneventful transition.
All three of them were in bed listing to me wrap up on “Now that you are big boys” speech by the glow of the nightlight. I promised that there would be reward for going to sleep quietly, that we would do something special tomorrow to celebrate. “So sweet, ” I thought as I left the room. Miraculously, it happened. Not even talking in the dark. Soon the whole house was quiet. At 4:10 am silence ended. Blasting into my head came MY singing the Beatles’ Yellow Submarine, but only the refrain we all live in a yellow sub-marine yellow submarine yellow submarine over and over again. The shouting that joined the singing coming out of the monitor confirmed that MO and MM felt similarly to their Dad and I.
MO: You’re gonna ruin it! Be quiet!
MM: I was sound asleep! (He sounds like he’s crying…?)
MO: You’re such a baby! Go back to your own room!
MY: WE ALL LIVE IN A YELLOW SUBMARINE YELLOW SUBMARINE YELLOW SUBMARINE ( Much louder, and out of bed stomping around! )
MO: Now you are going to get it!
MM: (He’s definitely crying.)
The sound of footsteps running across the room . Yellow Submarine ceases. There is a grunt. More Running footsteps, again . Sibling punishment dispensed.
MY: (Starts crying.)
It was a full on breakdown of peacefulness. Tantrum central. I ferociously turned on the mic as a voice that I pulled out left no room for inattention. It meant business. Not a chance of misinterpretation. I even made myself listen.
MOM: Be quiet! You are supposed to stay in bed! You should be asleep! MY Greco! Did I move you to the big boy room to early?! There will be no reward tomorrow! Now think about it so you don’t make the same mistake. Quietly! NOW GOOD NIGHT!
Silence. It worked. Fran acknowledges my success with a nod of relief. Exhale. Beat . Beat.
Suddenly, blasting through the intercom:
MY: (with big boy conviction) Mom! Stop copying my brothers!
The NIGHTIME MAYHEM had set sail.
